The Serpent Soul Pincher.

Sometimes I feel I should be sitting on a throne being praised and recognized and adored. And at that same instant I feel my flesh should be burning away in hell along with everything that I know. And while I'm feeling I belong in hell I can feel God pulling me upwards showing me what I have to do to go with him and be saved. My feet are planted on the floor with the roots stronger than that of a tree's, and my arms are being tugged at and pulled as if a force is pulling me upwards. I'm stuck. It hurts. And on top of that, people expect me to do things for them, they assume that because I can hide myself from them that nothing is wrong. I lie a lot. I hate you so much. But I can see right through you and I hate you and want to pick out your eyes with my fingers and the exact same time I love you and want to pray for you and want you to kill me instead. But since my cries of help are heard faintly and ignored, I can see again and again how you reject me. And suddenly I see where I want to be and why the hell you mean so much to me. It's hard to let go of you but I can't stand your slaps at my face anymore.

I feel as if I have strings attached to my hands and am being dragged through a path that only those born to be unfortunate can trespass. And the woman who moves me around like a puppet is just sitting there, laughing and laughing at her creation.